missnewbody's Notizen

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07 Juli 2014

Gewicht: Bisher verloren: Still to go: Diät befolgt:
80,6 kg 16,9 kg 30,8 kg Recht gut
   Kommentar hinzufügen Verlust von 1,0 kg pro Woche

30 Juni 2014

Gewicht: Bisher verloren: Still to go: Diät befolgt:
81,6 kg 15,9 kg 31,8 kg Recht gut
   Kommentar hinzufügen Verlust von 0,6 kg pro Woche

25 Juni 2014

Gewicht: Bisher verloren: Still to go: Diät befolgt:
82,1 kg 15,4 kg 32,2 kg Recht gut
   Kommentar hinzufügen Verlust von 1,1 kg pro Woche

16 Juni 2014

Gewicht: Bisher verloren: Still to go: Diät befolgt:
83,5 kg 14,1 kg 33,6 kg Recht gut
   Kommentar hinzufügen Verlust von 0,7 kg pro Woche

09 Juni 2014

Am I only worth how thin and attractive I am? Seems to me that that's just how it goes for us women.

I've never been thin. During my 24 years of life, I've never known what it felt like to be seen as something more than part of the background. I could be bubbly and happy and intelligent and kind - but being fat negated any positive qualities I had. When I walk into a store, I take extra care not to buy clothes that might make me look too confident or happy with myself. After all, no fat person would dare to actually be happy or confident! I never go out, it's too embarrassing.


I've never been the conventionally attractive girl who can simply sit around and drive in hordes of men. Men have never approached me, period. Barring online dating, I've never been asked out. People don't treat me nicely for no reason.


Who am I? I'm the fat girl who sits in the staff lounge alone, reading to stave off loneliness. I'm the girl who once tried to go beyond her comfort zone by going to a club all dolled up, only to be left standing alone all night. I'm the girl who feels ashamed of working out -- seeing all the other girls in their short shorts and sports bras, showing off their toned bodies -- while I struggle with my rolls to do a proper lunge.


So I stopped shopping for cute clothes and doing my hair.
I avoid eye contact with men so I don't give them the (incorrect) impression that I'm interested -- they may find it too disgusting.
I don't attempt to make friends, it hurts too much when I lose them.
I don't smile much anymore. There's nothing to smile about.
I keep my head down and patiently count down the days.

Gewicht: Bisher verloren: Still to go: Diät befolgt:
84,1 kg 13,4 kg 34,2 kg Recht gut
   (9 Kommentare) Verlust von 1,1 kg pro Woche


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